Same-sex marriage

We won our #dignity and #freedom as #LGBT in America

I am still in shock. My body is shaking, unsure whether I should laugh or cry, dance or scream. Maybe there is a way to do it all at the same time. 

Honestly, I never thought this day would come.  I remember how I felt the day my state banned my rights by constitutional amendment. It hurt, but I knew that my state and country default to hate and denial of dignity. We have never been good at respecting basic human rights.  

I want to feel like this is a victory, because it is, but I still don't feel like I am awake.  Reality has merged with my dreams in a way that I can't believe happened.

This feeling, smiling while on the verge of tears, is one of the most amazing feeling I have ever experienced.  Today, I am finally a full citizen in my country.

The nature of injustice is that we may not always see it in our own times,” Kennedy wrote in the 34-page opinion. “The generations that wrote and ratified the Bill of Rights and the Fourteenth Amendment did not presume to know the extent of freedom in all of its dimensions, and so they entrusted to future generations a charter protecting the right of all persons to enjoy liberty as we learn its meaning.
Supreme Court Affirms Constitutionality of Gay Marriage - US News

The tide of progress marches forward, and our understanding of liberty and oppression grow over time.  As science continues to offer us a better understanding of the world as it is, we see the foolishness of past generations in the clear light of wisdom.  All humans are equal.  All humans.

It is now clear that the challenged laws burden the liberty of same-sex couples, and it must be further acknowledged that they abridge central precepts of equality … Especially against a long history of disapproval of their relationships, this denial to same-sex couples of the right to marry works a grave and continuing harm. The imposition of this disability on gays and lesbians serves to disrespect and subordinate them. And the Equal Protection Clause, like the Due Process Clause, prohibits this unjustified infringement of the fundamental right to marry.
Justice Kennedy, “The Ideals Of Love,” And Other Key Quotes From The Huge Supreme Court Victory / Queerty

To read the court calling the discrimination I have lived with my entire life "unjustified infringement" is one of those moments beyond words.  I have been married to the person I love for almost two decades.  Married in the eyes of God, but not in the state I live in.  To be told that our relationship was a danger to the country hurt.  Now, we can start planning a wedding...

These words now cover my community too:

Section 1. All persons born or naturalized in the United States, and subject to the jurisdiction thereof, are citizens of the United States and of the State wherein they reside. No State shall make or enforce any law which shall abridge the privileges or immunities of citizens of the United States; nor shall any State deprive any person of life, liberty, or property, without due process of law; nor deny to any person within its jurisdiction the equal protection of the laws.
— Fourteenth Amendment to the United States Constitution

It is hard to express my joy.  I am sure this post makes me sound like a rambling idiot, but I had to say something, and I had to say it now.  I am an equal citizen in my country.  After 37 years of second class citizenship, I am now equal. We are now equal.

Missouri House declares state sovereignty, dark ages follow

A woman makes her support of her marriage, and...
Image via Wikipedia

Isn't this how the Civil War started?

JEFFERSON CITY, Mo. (AP) - Missouri House members have given preliminary approval to a constitutional amendment that asserts the state's right to reject federal actions.

The measure says that Missouri will not enforce or recognize various federal policies. Those policies would cover subjects such as hate crimes, gun control and allowing civil unions or same sex marriage (KFVS12).

So the right of someone to beat up or kill a Faggot, keep us from having equal rights, and ready access to guns are so important that they have to be enshrined in the state constitution... and why are they mixed together like that... that doesn't make me feel very good...

Since the Nullification Crisis of the early 1800s, the US has recognized the supremacy of federal law over state law.  This is one cycle from the past we can skip... ugh

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Prop 8 Broke Our Hearts

Op-Ed from Human Rights Campaign President Joe Solmonese

queer_sf You can’t take this away from me: Proposition 8 broke our hearts, but it did not end our fight.

Like many in our movement, I found myself in Southern California last weekend.  There, I had the opportunity to speak with a man who said that Proposition 8 completely changed the way he saw his own neighborhood.  Every “Yes on 8” sign was a slap. For this man, for me, for the 18,000 couples who married in California, to LGBT people and the people who love us, its passage was worse than a slap in the face.  It was nothing short of heartbreaking.

But it is not the end.  Fifty-two percent of the voters of California voted to deny us our equality on Tuesday, but they did not vote our families or the power of our love out of existence; they did not vote us away.

As free and equal human beings, we were born with the right to equal families.  The courts did not give us this right—they simply recognized it.  And although California has ceased to grant us marriage licenses, our rights are not subject to anyone’s approval.  We will keep fighting for them. They are as real and as enduring as the love that moves us to form families in the first place.   There are many roads to marriage equality, and no single roadblock will prevent us from ultimately getting there.

And yet there is no denying, as we pick ourselves up after losing this most recent, hard-fought battle, that we’ve been injured, many of us by neighbors who claim to respect us. We see them in the supermarkets, on the sidewalk, and think “how could you?”

marriage By the same token, we know that we are moving in the right direction.  In 2000, California voters passed Proposition 22 by a margin of 61.4% to 38.6%.  On Tuesday, fully 48% of Californians rejected Proposition 8. It wasn’t enough, but it was a massive shift.  Nationally, although two other anti-marriage ballot measures won, Connecticut defeated an effort to hold a constitutional convention ending marriage, New York’s state legislature gained the seats necessary to consider a marriage law, and FMA architect Marilyn Musgrave lost her seat in Congress.  We also elected a president who supports protecting the entire community from discrimination and who opposes discriminatory amendments.

Yet on Proposition 8 we lost at the ballot box, and I think that says something about this middle place where we find ourselves at this moment. In 2003, twelve states still had sodomy laws on the books, and only one state had civil unions.  Four years ago, marriage was used to rile up a right-wing base, and we were branded as a bigger threat than terrorism.  In 2008, most people know that we are not a threat.  Proposition 8 did not result from a popular groundswell of opposition to our rights, but was the work of a small core of people who fought to get it on the ballot.  The anti-LGBT message didn’t rally people to the polls, but unfortunately when people got to the polls, too many of them had no problem with hurting us.  Faced with an economy in turmoil and two wars, most Californians didn’t choose the culture war.  But faced with the question—brought to them by a small cadre of anti-LGBT hardliners – of whether our families should be treated differently from theirs, too many said yes.

But even before we do the hard work of deconstructing this campaign and readying for the future, it’s clear to me that our continuing mandate is to show our neighbors who we are.

Justice Lewis Powell was the swing vote in Bowers, the case that upheld Georgia’s sodomy law and that was reversed by Lawrence v. Texas five years ago.  When Bowers was pending, Powell told one of his clerks “I don’t believe I’ve ever met a homosexual.”  Ironically, that clerk was gay, and had never come out to the Justice.  A decade later, Powell admitted his vote to uphold Georgia’s sodomy law was a mistake.

Everything we’ve learned points to one simple fact: people who know us are more likely to support our equality.

In recent years, I’ve been delivering this positive message: tell your story. Share who you are.  And in fact, as our families become more familiar, support for us increases. But make no mistake: I do not think we have to audition for equality.  Rather, I believe that each and every one of us who has been hurt by this hateful ballot measure, and each and every one of us who is still fighting to be equal, has to confront the neighbors who hurt us.  We have to say to the man with the Yes on 8 sign—you disrespected my humanity, and I am not giving you a pass.  I am not giving you a pass for explaining that you tolerate me, while at the same time denying that my family has a right to exist.  I do not give you permission to say you have me as a “gay friend” when you cast a vote against my family, and my rights.

Wherever you are, tell a neighbor what the California Supreme Court so wisely affirmed: that you are equal, you are human, and that being denied equality harms you materially.  Although I, like our whole community, am shaken by Prop 8’s passage, I am not yet ready to believe that anyone who knows us as human beings and understands what is at stake would consciously vote to harm us.

This is not over.  In California, our legal rights have been lost, but our human rights endure, and we will continue to fight for them.

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